A Pit bull decided he would battle a Porcupine in back of his house in Southern California .

But being both brave and STUPID, he ultimately learned the hard way that he can't always win.

No matter how tough you are.





A vet sedated the dog, and then removed a total of 1,347 quills.

The dog survived, and hopefully learned a valuable lesson.

Now tell me you're having a bad day!!!

This is an e-mail I received. Thought it was pretty good.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Doctors

(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is

700,000.

(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians

per year are

120,000.

(C) Accidental deaths per physician

is

0.171.

Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of

Health Human Services.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Now think about this:
Guns

(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S.

is

80,000,000.

(Yes, that's 80 million)



(B) The number of accidental gun deaths

per year, all age groups,

is

1,500.





(C) The number of accidental deaths

per gun owner

is

.000188.

Statistics courtesy of FBI

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

So, statistically, doctors are approximately

9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Remember, 'Guns don't kill people, doctors do.'

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN,
BUT

ALMOST EVERYONE HAS AT LEAST ONE DOCTOR.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Please alert your friends

to this
alarming threat.

We must ban doctors

before this gets completely out of hand!!!!!

Out of concern for the public at large,

I withheld the statistics on

lawyers

for fear the shock would cause

people to panic and seek medical attention.

Leptospirosis

Clean your cans!
This incident happened recently in North Texas. A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the
refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and
placed in ICU. She died on Wednesday.

The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis. This was traced
to the can of coke she drank from without using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis.

Rat urine contains toxic and deathly substances. It is highly
recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of soda cans before drinking out of them.

The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported
straight to the shops without being cleaned. A study at NYCU showed that the tops of soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e).. full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident.

Please tell all the people you care about.
(I JUST DID)!

Ya'll have A Nice Day!

California Driving Test Answers

The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school (read at Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can't see my license plate.

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying "Guns don't kill people. I do."

Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car?
A: Always wear a condom.

Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.

Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too shit faced to find your keys.

Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?
A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?
A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.

Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute.

Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light
and a flashing yellow traffic light?
A: The color.

Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic?
A: Heavy psychedelics.

Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?
A: Carry loaded weapons.

Q: Why would it be difficult to be a police officer?
A: It would be tough to be a dickhead all day long.